Cats, I have discovered, are the prostitutes of the animal kingdom. They will sell you a reasonably convincing facsimile of their affection for food. They will rub up against your legs and mew with all the guile of a newborn baby and affectionately come and sit right next to you on a bench for your samosa. They will then look up at you with those large, crystal eyes, mutely pledging their undying allegiance to you and your samosa. They will squabble incessantly with other cats who approach you. "This one's mine, all mine" they will spit at the intruder, as they chase him/her away and resume their seat right next to you. They will lie down next to your feet and invite you to rub their bellies and purr winningly while you do it. They shall do all this and then some, right up until the moment when someone with biryani comes along and sits down at the table next to you.