Monday, June 28, 2004

80's

Cutting Crew - I Just Died In Your Arms Tonight

This song is one of those cheesy 80's songs that, were there no memories attached to it, you would laugh at and dismiss, but it makes me physically nostalgic (if that's even possible) everytime I hear it.

I get flashed of those long rides home in the schoolbus from Saddar to Defence and back again in the mornings. On these occasions, I would grab the very last row of seats in the back and resolutely stick to the right hand corner of that seat. Since I was usually among the first kids to be picked up on the route, I got no trouble getting the seat of my choice. The reason I chose this seat was that one of the speakers connected to the Van's stereo system was right next to it, ensuring me a prime spot to listen to the Dj, aka the Van driver, play his choice of music. The driver in question was a super-cool guy with a taste for eighties music and it was in this very van that I heard my first ever spatterings of english music. Up until that point, music wasn't really a big feature in my life if you leave out my dad's incessant playing of Funkytown everytime we took a long road trip.

At that time, being an awkward and shy kid who never seemed to do anything right in a van full of college girls wasn't much fun and music gave me a chance to escape reality, one van ride at a time. It was in this period that I heard the Cutting Crew song and memories of that escapism flood back everytime I listen to this song.

Misha at Monday, June 28, 2004

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Sunday, June 27, 2004

mean girls?

Isn't it absolutely amazing how life works out absolutely perfectly in teen movies? Wish I existed in one of them because by the end of two hours, I'd have found a sleaze-free boyfriend who I could call the love of my life, one or more absolutely genuine friends with whom I could exist imperfect harmony and the bad guys (from my perspective) would have gotten theirs and life would be well on its way to being absolutely set. How utterly moronic is that? If teen movie characters actually existed in the real world, they'd probably kill themselves due to the inability to deal stressful and imperfect situations that last more than the required two hours fifteen minutes.

On the plus side, this teen movie has enhanced my vocabulary. Are you read for this? "Fugly", adj: Derived from fucking ugly. One whose physical attributes closely resemble those of a canine. Now let's use it in a sentence. This is what preteens today are learning from watching movies? No wonder they're so messed up.

Misha at Sunday, June 27, 2004

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Saturday, June 26, 2004

look ma, im a deviant!

Chalo, the day was more constructive than I had thought. Dream and e-liminator's post spurred me into creating a deviantart gallery for myself. Completely ameteur stuff, but I enjoy it anyway, so who cares?

http://mishaone.deviantart.com/gallery

Misha at Saturday, June 26, 2004

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a little slice of contentment

Last night I dreamed that my old school chums and I had gone on a road trip in a van to one of the Hill stations, most likely Nathiagali. Once there, I was on a shooting spree with my camera. Taking pictures of the grassy knolls and everything around me, I realized this was the closest to truly happy I had ever been.

Is it such a surprise then, that upon being rudely awakened at two pm for lunch, I got mildly depressed. Had I any photographic talents, I probably would have loved to become a professional photographer. Travel (which I love), taking photos (which I do anyway at the slightest provocation), and freelance assignments. What could be better?

Misha at Saturday, June 26, 2004

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Friday, June 25, 2004

limbo

The inevitable result of sleeping at four a.m. is that I am now caught up in a sort of timeless void. Time ceases to matter. Since I rarely gaze out of the windows, day or night or time has lost any meaning for me. Mum's not well and everyone else is at work all day so there isn't really any means of getting out and going anywhere, and classes for this week have been rescheduled as well so no university. Just me and my PC. Oh, and my bed.

Misha at Friday, June 25, 2004

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Thursday, June 24, 2004

self esteem goes down the toilet

A search for a friend's name's meaning and origin gone astray led me to some very colorful meanings of my own name. Certain unnamed people *cough*abid*cough* found this highly amusing so I though I'd share.

Firstly, my name has Russian origins, spelling varying from Misha to Mischa. The good news is that the meaning of Misha/Mishca in Russian is "Like God". How's that for a power trip? The bad news is that its mainly a male name, and is used as a cutesy nickname for Russian men named Michael.

Then I found that my name has some strange roots in Native American history. To quote a lady on soem name messageboard:

Posted by: Priapos Lovs (212.251.72.135)
Date and time: January 05, 2001 at 2:03:38 AM

There are sketchy references of Misha as a Native American name throughout the Web. As far as I could find, a "Misha-nnock" (tree scratcher) is a squirrel in one dialect. I found an other reference to "Misha Sapokni", meaning "beyond age". A transcendental squirrel perhaps? Who knows.


Now for the Arabic/Urdu origins that my parents actually intended (I hope). According to one website, Misha means "beautiful, pretty". Talk about false advertising.

Misha at Thursday, June 24, 2004

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Wednesday, June 23, 2004

grrrr...

Stupid questions, the bane of hotheaded people everywhere. If you're in a position of authority/leadership, albeit against your will, you will come across many many people armed with stupid questions. For example, a classmate called and woke me up from my afternoon nap just to ask who we are to send the RR presentation to. The answer? A suppressed sigh from me. "The RR instructor, of course". "What is his email address?" asks the intrerruptor. Since I have written the email address on many occasions, and most certainly included it in the last email to everyone telling them to submit said presentation to said instructor at so and so address, this really pissed me off, to the point of almost slamming the phone down. Call me a bitch but I'm entitled to tell people who wake me up to ask stupid question to go forth and multiply with themselves.

Misha at Wednesday, June 23, 2004

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Tuesday, June 22, 2004

*drip*

I have reached the conclusion that hot weather added to holidays mixed with no water makes people very, very itchy for a good confrontation. Currently the residents of my building (mum with minor slipped disc included) and their servants are sending angry messages back and forth and some are even showing up in person, the haughty deities. The source of the conflict? To put it in my own words, it's bloody hot and there's no damn water because the idiots in charge of doling out the water supply have gone and wrecked the machine. While it may not be an ideal plan for a vacation, it certainly is amusing to watch aunties and various uncles going at it hammers and tongs with the blaming game and the servants watching amusedly from the sidelines.

Misha at Tuesday, June 22, 2004

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Monday, June 21, 2004

gmail

Who knew that with a free invite to try Gmail thanks to my active blogging, so much entertainment could be had. Turns out you get about six invites to give out at will. i didn't really know what to do with them until I was pointed to a site called gmailswap in which people offer some really interesting swaps for an invite.

Update: Traded in invites for a hi-res jpeg with my name in phonetically accurate Chinese, a very amusing sound clip of a guy singing Supercalifragilisticexpialidocous and the Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy series in e-book format. And I thought invite swapping was a useless waste of time!

Misha at Monday, June 21, 2004

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Sunday, June 20, 2004

bon voyage

My little brother is off on a Pakistan tour with his friends. The significance of this event is that he's never travelled alone or without adult supervision before and the cause of my mother hugging and pestering him about what exactly he will take along, what he should and shouldn't eat and what he should or shouldn't do has been the cause of much sarcastic hilarity, ending up with my sister and I giving him 'worldly advice' about taking candy from strangers a la mum whever he sets foot outside the house. Poor thing will be glad to leave on monday at last and get away from a house full of concerned and mock concerned females.

Misha at Sunday, June 20, 2004

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Saturday, June 19, 2004

Got a huge shock this morning to read in Huma's Blog that a beloved frequenter of the EP forum and blogs, Bartender, had passed away in an accident. Thanks to an anonymous tipper on the EP forum claiming to be bartender's brother, everyone believes it, but there seems to be hope yet. Although I don't even know the guy half as well as I wish I did, I admired him nonetheless, beginning with his excellent interpretation of Nine Inch Nails' Eraser. Here's hoping he gets back home safe and sound and proves that this whole thing was some sort of horrible misunderstanding.

Edit: Bartender posted this morning. He's okay and everyone's looking for action against the anonymous tipper claiming to be his brother.

Misha at Saturday, June 19, 2004

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Thursday, June 17, 2004

communication breakdown

It baffles me how my best friend can communicate with my own mother better than I do. This realisation came to me when Mehar and I were discussing a serious problem of hers and she asked me to 'have a word' with my mother about it to see if she had a solution. At which point I automatically said that she should have a word with my mum instead since her 'words' seem to make more sense to my mum than my own. Come to that, I can't seem to get along with my dad either since he demands complete obedience, which I am incapable of giving, even to people I respect a lot like Dr. Sheikh, for instance.

Misha at Thursday, June 17, 2004

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Ow!

What do you call someone stupid enough to bicycle 5 km on her first day of exercising? You call her Misha, of course. Yesterday after biking 5 Km in one energetic go, the adrenaline rush made me believe that swimming right after for two hours would be no biggie. Turned out I was right... for the moment. Got home, bursting with energy and did some work before going to sleep. The morning after, knee joints hurt like the devil and cannot move from bed out of agony. Stuffed face with painkillers and limped to the university and turns out the presentation midterm was postponed. I would have kicked something had my legs not had enough damage to them already. Never again!

Misha at Thursday, June 17, 2004

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Saturday, June 12, 2004

swim

Tired of electricity shortages, sweating buckets and sitting panting in the AC all day? I sure as hell am and from tomorrow, nothing will stop me from the ultimate morning swimming session to cool off. MUA-HA-HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Misha at Saturday, June 12, 2004

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marketing, bloody marketing

It seems I'm not going to get the chance to be a working stiff anytime soon. The Worldcall internships are apparently Daily Times internships in disguise. By having applied I could have one of the following exciting opportunities:

1. Field Marketing: Roaming about in this heat to sell Daily Times subscriptions door to door. Sounds tempting, especially in the lovely weather we've been having, but I'll pass, thank you very much.

2. Strategic Marketing: Eliminating the delightfully fun randomness of door to door khwaari salesmanship, you get to go to certain offices and 'important' people and convince them to buy a Daily Times subscription.

3. Event Management: Plan and manage certain Daily Times events.

Can anyone tell me why a BCS student, a technical (wo)man by nature, would be assigned to marketing jobs? Which was why I had eliminated the possibility of getting a field job when I applied, having clearly stated the (programming) languages and tools I know. This bites.

Misha at Saturday, June 12, 2004

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Friday, June 11, 2004

2:30 am and all's well

As a family unit, today was one of the more pleasant days we've had. Normal, even. No squabbling, no sarcastic jabs, no bitterness, just jovial verbal pokes at one another's expense. The afternoon heat forced us all to sit in one of two air conditioned rooms. Turns out spending time together, albeit forced by the weather, is a good thing. Also, with the PC being infected by the lesser known but very annoying 'Jeefo' virus, (named, no doubt, after its geek creator in a dark lab somewhere) and a continual lack of electricity forced us to actually converse, since there was no other form of entertainment to be had.

As always, my siblings and I are from different planets; little brother from the 'business' side and I from the 'techie' side and sis, the youngest, in the arts field. With Mum representing the 'pissed off at inconsiderate neighbors who hog all the water' club, aunt from 'pissed off at bankers who are full of themselves' land and Dad from a large continent called 'stop talking and listen to me', we make an interesting unit, but not one with a lot in common, except blood ties. Put them all in the same room, and you have a very strange little party going on.

Misha at Friday, June 11, 2004

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job-huntin'

For the first time in my life, I am applying for a job without bothering with sources, people putting in a good word or having well places relatives waiting to hand me the position. Mostly, with internships, you don't exactly get paid much, if at all. As a general rule, you get inconsequential and unimportant work and a salary to match, in addition to which, you should be grateful a good company is even taking a chance on you.

A good friend told me that Worldcall, being a relatively new company, is looking for interns now, and paying an amount most interns don't get offered everyday. So what the heck, I could use the cash, and it's not like my daily planner's bursting with activity anyway, so I'm going to apply. Here's to applying honestly for a job! *clink*

Misha at Friday, June 11, 2004

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Tuesday, June 08, 2004

random ranting

I've recently noticed a summer trend: thinking about hair. Wherever I go, people are talking about their hair, other people's hair, how they should wear their hair, what color to get it, highlights vs. er, lowlights, how short, how long, etc etc. Something about summer that fills hair-lovers with renewed vigor. Strangely, I only worry about my hair in the winter, because realistically, I'm not going to be doing anything other than tying it in a ponytail in this heat. When I see people with hair down to their lower spines flowing freely in this heat, I can do little but shake my head in disbelief. That and girls wearing sleeveless outfits in the dead of winter. Admittedly, winter in Karachi isn't much, but it's still respectably cold enough to make all followers of the discipline of common sense wear a little more clothing, rather than freeze half to death in order to look good at someone's wedding.

Why the rant on fashion, by me of all people? Because what's really occupying my mind is not worth the telling of it in a public blog.

Misha at Tuesday, June 08, 2004

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Monday, June 07, 2004

Why won't it stop? Is there some small part of me left uncorrupted still? Take it, for the love of God, take it and just leave me silence. The pure, beautiful silence that I have been denied half my life.

Misha at Monday, June 07, 2004

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Sunday, June 06, 2004

pointless

A lack of emotions is nothing to be happy about. Or is it?

Okay, that's about all I can take of the non-mundane for the moment. It seems I'm back to square one. The fish among birds. Among my classmates, that is. I always feel this barrier between us that may or may not be my own creation. How to pull it down. Or rather, do I even want it to be pulled down? The last few semesters I had become them. Happy, moderately fluff-for brains and full of pointless gossip and topics of conversations. I can never really be one of them. When I first joined, it was a bit of culture shock to see that fifty percent of the girls in the class wore dupattas on their heads and I SO did not fit in. I learned to change myself to fit in, afraid of being alone. What the hell, I'm never really going to be one of them. Most of them don't watch cable, have never had close male friends, all of which are regulars in my own life.

Anyhow, the question is, is it worth it to bother fitting in, really? Is there a point to changing yourself to something that is unnatural for you in order to be accepted? Even when you never really will be completely accepted anyway?

Misha at Sunday, June 06, 2004

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Saturday, June 05, 2004

dehydrated

If I were asked to describe today in one word, it would be 'dehydrated'. Five glasses of water, one glass of Ice-cold Tang and on glass of Pepsi later, I'm still feeling thirsty. Visited the Park Towers Music City after a long, long timee and got a couple of movies. Still waiting for PoA to show up at the local movie guy's place.

Turns out my digital camera's replacement rechargable batteries would cost Rs. 1500 per pair, which seemed rather outrageous. Everyone's out to lootofy you these days.

On a completely irrelevant note, does anyone know the urdu word that has the same meaning as 'perfect' or 'perfection'?

Misha at Saturday, June 05, 2004

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Thursday, June 03, 2004

Jhoom! Sari raat jhoom!
Gol Gol Ghoom!
- Pyaar Ka Jadu, Zoahib Hassan

This song always lifts me up. Makes me want to 'gol gol ghoom' till I'm dizzy. Talk about mood swings, huh? Something about cheesy but fun Disco-esque songs that make you want to spin till the world's a multicolored mess swooshing by your eyes.

Sadly, the plans for the installation of Redhat have been halted because I must first download Patition Magic. In the meantime... (I can't believe I'm saying this) Maza aaraha hai?!

Disclaimer: I'm not on anything, I swear.

Misha at Thursday, June 03, 2004

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grrr

Damn Microsoft to hell! Formatted XP thrice in two weeks and changed from browser to browser. I am officially shifting to Redhat now. Goodbye forever, blasted Microsoft products!

Misha at Thursday, June 03, 2004

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huzzah!

It's alive! The 'Pod is alive! :D

Misha at Thursday, June 03, 2004

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Wednesday, June 02, 2004

birds

As I was sitting in the car today, waiting for my mum to finish socializing so we could go home, I saw one of those guys with a whole family of little wild birds that deserve to twitter about freely, hopping more than walking, and was caught by a memory. When I was nine and my brother seven, we saw one of these birdcatchers and felt so sorry for the poor things that we paid the man our collective fortunes as of that moment (A grand sum of thirty rupees) to set as many birds free as he could. The man let six go (Five rupees per bird. At last, the price of freedom is defined) and we convinced our aunt to pay the man some more to let them all go. We then went home, happy that we had saved the poor, cramped little wild birds from imprisonment. What makes me recall that day in particular is that we were both so free of cynicism and world-weariness that we actually believed that those birds would fly free forever. Now, that sort of innocence and belief in basic human goodness, namely that the man would let them be free once he has been paid for their release, is something I could never get. I miss that innocence.

Misha at Wednesday, June 02, 2004

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a-browsin' we will go

As with verything else on my crappy PC, Internet Explorer has let me down... again. Back to Opera and strangely, everything looks distorted, like viewing the Internet through a funhouse mirror. As I write, this textbox was once wider than it was tall. Now it's roughly the shape of the 'News In brief' column running down the side of the newspaper.

Misha at Wednesday, June 02, 2004

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